A sense of restlessness

This post is much more personal that most of my posts are. They are a collection of musings on a single topic that I have had over the last few months. If that is the least bit interesting to you and I wouldn't blame you for it, bail out NOW!. If you are a thirty-something like me and feeling restless with where things are headed, read ON. Misery loves company.<rant>I am in my early (OK, closer to mid) thirties. I absolutely love my job. I find it incredibly interesting and thoroughly enjoyable. I have a great set of colleagues. I have a wonderful family. I adore my son and admire and love my wife. I read quite a bit of everything although not as much as I used to and love to write. I absolutely love to talk to people about everything under the Sun and beyond. And yet, I feel restless. Very much so.I feel this inertia that I think I am unable to break from. I want to do a lot of things but I am unable to do them because of something that I feel is holding me back. And it is definitely not for the lack of trying. I just thing I am not trying hard enough, thanks to, drumroll please, the same inertia. It is hard to explain but I am sure some of you have experienced it, are experiencing it or will probably experience it at some point in your life. Let me be clear, this is not remotely a mid-life crisis. My life is perfectly nice, thank you. Its more of the mind that feels like it is shackled. I think and believe I can and want to do more but hesitate to take a concrete step towards it. Every step I have taken has been half assed with not much punch to it. And its frustrating.Here is a partial list of everything I have tried to do and abandoned in the last few months- write a short story, draw a kid's book, start a company, get back into painting, build a Ludo board for my son, get into pottery, start a company (yep, twice), write a cool Android app, write a cool iPhone app, build a website, publish a book, and the list goes on. Every time I embarked on one of these things, I believed in it, I believed I could do it, I thought I had the knowledge and the skill but just didn't execute fully.  So what is the problem?I have had a pretty cooperative wife who by now is having a ball watching me embark on these affairs of passing interest. My son has started sleeping earlier than before, thereby giving me a little more time. But, I haven't gotten it done. With every failed attempt, I feel even more restless. I don't have confidence issues when it comes to these new affairs. Just the lack of conviction to see it through. In all this time, I have been doing perfectly fine at work and have continued to blog at a pretty reasonable frequency. Nothing else has sustained quite as well.I want to break out of these self imposed mental shackles. If you the reader has a pathway to glory for me, please do share. I would love to read and learn. I am sure some of you have stared at this sense of ennui in its face and bore it down. I sure would love to do the same.</rant>If you managed to stay on until here, thanks for lending a virtual ear (eye). I appreciate your  support.Starting next week, we will be back to our regular programming. Pardon the interruption.